"Northanger Abbey" by Val McDermid

An audio book.

Catherine Morland, 17, from Dorset, home-schooled, is invited to accompany well-off neighbours to the Edinburgh festival where she meets her brother and his friends. She's rather new to the world of dating and events. She's into The Hunger Games, various Zombie and vampire novels/films etc. There are some Edinburgh Festival in-jokes, and niche one (about William Letford!). There's lot of fuss about Catherine wanting to see Henry and avoid other men who just want to show their cars off. Henry Tilney's father, a general, lives in Northanger Abbey. He's rather old-fashioned, and doesn't allow WiFi. Catherine wonders whether his wife isn't after all dead - maybe she's imprisoned in a tower. Henry scares her with rumours. Catherine thinks his long-established family might be vampires (there's a bible with a bullet-hole, the list of family births it suspicious, etc). She confesses her suspicions to Henry, who forgives her. Catherine's brother James suddenly announces his engagement only for the girl to call it off and announce she's engaged to Freddie, Henry's brother - a scoundrel. But the girl says her phone was stolen by Freddie who posted malicious messages. Elli and Catherine decide to write a children's book together. The general suddenly sends Catherine home to Dorset. Henry visits her to apologise for her father, who doesn't like lesbians (he'd misunderstood Catherine's friendship with Elli). Henry wondered if Catherine was gay. Elli's angry, but eventually they make up.

I did Northanger Abbey for my O-levels at school, and I've recently listened to Persuasion. I'm not an Austen fan. This book increases my respect for McDermid's writing skills, though the style's nothing like that of her other books I've read. That said, it's a very cosy ride. The vocabulary and some of the morality seem rather stuck in the Austen era. Though Facebook, etc are mentioned, social media etiquette and strategies aren't deeply explored.

Other reviews

• Jenny Coglan (There is some delightful social skewering, and McDermid is clearly enjoying herself, but it feels as though there is nothing new to say on the subject)
• Laurel Ann Nattress (In the second installment of The Austen Project ... the author has really created a complete translation, scene for scene, and sometimes word for word ... a retelling instead of the reimagining that it was advertised as)

"How the dead speak" by Val McDermid

An audio book.

Dr Tony Hill is in jail. He killed to spare Carol needing to kill. He's writing a book about psychological profiling. He offers to do a little series on the prison radio station. His mother Vanessa stole the chance of him knowing his father.

Mark Conway is a multi-millionnaire. He invites Jeezer, his cousin, to have a seat on the board of his favourite football team.

Stacey and Paula are part of the REMIT team. Stacey has a successful side job. Paula's ex-boss was Carol who's resigned. Rutherford is her new boss.

Tony doesn't want Carol to visit him (though Carol loves him?). He says she has PTSD. She used to drink too. She goes to Melissa, an alternative therapist. Vanessa visits Tony, saying that she's lost £5 million in a scam and wants Carol to get the money back. She thinks that Carol somehow rigged the situation so that Tony killed someone she wanted dead.

Dozens of children's skeletons are found in the grounds of an old convent/children's home closed 5 years before. The REMIT team investigates.

The defence barrister in Tony's case, Bronwen Scott, visits Carol, offering her a job because Carol impressed her. Scott investigates miscarriages of justice. Nielson ("deeper in the closet than Narnia") was convicted for murdering call-boy Lyle Tate, but a body was never found. Carol interviews him.

Mark goes around gay bars etc looking for "new talent".

The police try to contact the girls and nuns who were dispersed around the country and beyond. A girl says that the mother superior inflicted corporal punishment. The groundsman Jeezer says he was asked to bury bodies and that a priest asked him to prepare graves for destitute women who died in the city to give them a decent burial. More bodies are found - men who had plastic bags on their heads. The priest is brought in for questioning. He'd caught Jeezer peeping at the girls. His answers cast doubt on Jeezer's. Jeezer's cousin is Mark, who bought him his cottage and gives him perks on match days.

Paula visits Tony to get tips in how to approach Mark, who slept rough for a while.

Tony does some talks for Razor wireless, the prison channel. Then he starts a reading course, using kids books so that the prisoners can read to their kids. A prisoner takes offence and cracks his skull. Eleanor, a hospital doctor, is Carol's girlfriend. Tony's taken to her hospital.

Paula tracks down the con-man. Vanessa unexpectedly arrives with a knife and gets her money. Paula's disappointed by her own reaction, walks into the sea then changes her mind. Next day the therapist, Melissa, convinces her she's doing well.

One of the bodies is Lyle Tate's but there are newer ones so if there's a series killer, Nielson is innocent. The police interview the mother superior who says she saw Jeezer and Mark bury something late one night.

The police track Mark down. He dies in a car chase. Enough evidence is found to incriminate him.

The religious people are defensive, thinking that people are trying to extort money from them because of a few bad priests. The criminals don't like helping the police. The different police units are in competition.

The book doesn't depend on surprising us. The first chapter already gives clues about who the culprit is. Chapters are headed by extracts from Tony's book, so we know he survives.

I like the way she writes at a sentence level (except for "He wore flip-flops on his feet"). I learnt only late that this is the 11th in a series that's been going for decades. I guess that's why we don't get Venessa's backstory etc.

Other reviews

• Stuart Kelly (This is a novel much concerned with education, about how it can liberate and how it can be used as a weapon. ... The other thematic chord involves, as it usually does in McDermid’s work, the nature of power and the abuse of power.)
• Kate Vane (He’s also refusing to see Carol until she gets therapy. This, for me, is problematic ... just one unfortunate example of McDermid sacrificing the long-term integrity of her characters to make an immediate plot gain. ... McDermid is capable of so much better than this and I think she knows it. )

"The mermaids singing" by Val McDermid

An audio book.

A man on a tour around Italy goes to the torture museum in San Gimignano. It gives him ideas on how to kill again - if he needs to.

The police boss, Cross (old fashioned), denies that 3 macabre murders are related. His team don't agree. In the team are John Brandon, who has 3 teenage kids, and Carol Jordan, who's alert to being treated differently to the men. She lives with her brother, a computer whizzkid.

Dr Tony Hill (Home Office) gives a talk on psychological profiling, looking for clients. He's glad when Brandon approaches him. He realises that Brandon's boss is resistant. Carol is assigned to work with him. They're attracted to each other. The two confide about their previous relationships. He is inhibited sexually. His earlier research into telephone sex has led to him receiving calls from a woman - the calls help him. Policeman Don Merrick is asked by his (and Carol's) boss to report Carol's actions to him. He pretends to be gay, goes round clubs, and gets info. An innocent suspect kills himself. Cross is suspended.

There's a 4th murder. A policeman this time. The man has access to an empty farmhouse with a cellar (it was his aunt's). He chloroforms Adam and takes him to it. He makes a snuff movie. He's interested in the media coverage. He wants respect.

Tony starts analysing. We have a chance to see how accurate his hunches are, The victims weren't openly gay, but their bodies were dumped in gay haunts. He wonders if his own problems are the result of his work, or vice versa. Carol wants to sleep with him, but he goes cold. She hears a sexy message on his answerphone. She suggests to him that the killer might be female and that s/he might have access to the expensive software that her brother uses to manipulate videos.

Kevin, a policeman, is sleeping with Penny, a journalist. Leaks are becoming unhelpful. There's a 5th murder - copycat? Tony disappears.

We learn (1st person PoV) that the killer had a prostitute mother, that he had a sex-op abroad (still ugly face though), that s/he killed her mother, that s/he's the phone-caller, and s/he's tied Tony in the cellar. Tony gets his captor to trust him enough to give him a chance to kill the captor as the police arrive - Carol had pieced together the clues with the help of Tony's hunches. Tony and Carol end up mutually respecting their skills. Tony tells her about his erectile disfunction issues.

Again I like McDermid's writing, though the meticulousness of the criminal leads to some sections being longer than I'd like.